Your Kickstarter Sucks

Let’s say you have a piece of paper with something important on it, but you need a digital copy of whatever is on that piece of paper. Some (I would posit most) people would use a flatbed scanner or a larger multi-function scanner/copier device to convert the document into a digital file. They then would take that scanned file and put it on a computer, flash drive, or other storage medium that will be readily accessible later.

But maybe this solution sounds too dated to you. Maybe you want a solution that involves sticking your iPhone into an unwieldy foot and a half tall aluminum/plastic monstrosity, firing up a proprietary application, and taking pictures of said documents with your phone’s camera. If so, the Scandock is the product for you.

At a mere $549 (retail, reduced to $479 plus $30 shipping for Kickstarter backers who buy now), the Scandock promises to finally thrust document scanning into the “post-PC future.” All you need is your phone and your Scandock, and you can scan any time, anywhere. No longer need you be bound to the ties of a desk or computer.

Yet in a clever twist, the Scandock is not truly portable by just about any definition of the term. Weighing in at over nine pounds, it does not fold up to store away - according to the designer, this would lead to an inferior user experience:

We thought about that and have explored that route. There were a few other products that offer portability as a feature, but it’s plasticky and users (including us) don’t like those comparison devices and the experience using them at all. So that’s why the dock is as it is.

Another reason is that for the device to function well, everything must be exact. The angle of the dock can’t be off by even a few degrees or else the camera would be in the wrong place capturing a wrong thing. The page edge could be missing or it may be skewed. The light profile would change in a material way. As such, it’s important functionality-wise and use experience-wise that the base, the neck piece, and the dock must be very rigid and don’t wobble.

Also somewhat unconventionally for a scanner that costs over $500 including shipping, there are no electronics (other than lights) in the Scandock. This is the post-PC future, after all, so the magic happens in the free Scandock app that you install on your phone. The software works in conjunction with the nigh-magical “Image IQ Color Pad” to correct colors and give you a high-quality final image. Sure, the Image IQ Color Pad might just be a tiny printed strip of colors on the base of the Scandock, but when scans come out looking as vibrant and realistic as this, well, who can argue?

Ladies and gentlemen, the Scandock. Quite possibly the biggest piece of shit we have ever featured on this blog. If this gets funded to the tune of 100 thousand fucking dollars, I am going to chop off my own dick.